[This is part of the How to do Everything Correctly Series. Check out the other posts!]
Update: Bearman pointed out that I never actually give tips to get rid of pet urine smell. This is because you can’t. This post is more about how to torture your urinating pet. Enjoy!
Does your pet keep marking their territory where you mark your territory? Don’t worry because I am going to help you solve that pet urine smell with the following 5 tips!
5 Tips To Stop Pet Urine Oder
1. Don’t purchase a pet
If you really want something that is going crap and pee all over the place at least try having a baby first.
2. Shoot the dang thing
Okay so let’s say you bought the pet and it is peeing on the children. Grab your BB gun. Shoot the pet each time it drains its lizard. Make sure to start out with a low powered gun and work your way up until the pet gets the picture.
3. Throw the pet
Gun not working or you couldn’t get the permit for the deer rifle, then throw the pet out the window. Dogs from the 2nd story and cats from the 3rd story. Make sure that there are power-lines below for the cat since they have the advantage of landing on their feet.
4. Poison their food
Start with a little Mr. Clean in their water. If that is not working then get out the bleach.
5. Dump the pets
Load up the pets, take them to the woods and dump them. Let them pee on the trees.
How do you get your pet to stop urinating everywhere? Share in a comment below!
note: spay or neuter your pets but if you follow any of the above steps then you are a big dope.
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How To Get Rid Of Pet Urine Smell – via @dummiesyear http://dummiesoftheyear.com/how-to-get-r…
I wish I read the last line before following the instructions. I shot, threw, poisoned, and dumped the dog… Now what? I’m missing my dog.
You can get the aroma of your dog back with two easy steps:
1. Drink water from the toilet.
2. Go take a pee on the carpet.
Bonus step: Get the dog stuffed and place him next to your urine spot.
that’s great advice on how to stop it but how do you get rid of the smell?
Baking Soda works wonders I hear.
Maybe I should have titled it, “Stop the smell of urine before it starts.”
Like Amnodt Heare, I too got excited and did all five steps before reading the last sentence. I feel like such a dope.
In hindsight, one could also purchase a litter box–cat problem solved. But for the doggies I suggest a doggie door that only lets them leave but not return.
From your response I see that you are a cat person.
If I owned a cat I would make them sleep on telephone wires.
Actually I think dogs can be too much fun. They don’t know when to settle down.
Since I tend to be quiet I wouldn’t mind owning a cat as long as it didn’t jump on things like my dishes.
Room Shocker is the best product I have used to handle nasty odors. It’s an odor eliminator so it doesn’t cover the smell with perfumes; it actually kills the smell at its source. It’s super easy to use and environmentally friendly, so no harsh chemicals. Check it out at http://www.biocidesystems.com/roomshocker1.html
No harsh chemicals? It kills the order at the source? So, can I use this on friends who smell bad
Thanks for the comment JJ.
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